Please post a written critique of the informative speech. For those not yet assigned a person to critique, you will post yours next week.
19 comments:
Anonymous
said...
Motorcycle Safety Had a demonstration of all DOT helmets and what was not considered a DOT helmet. She told us that you would get a ticket if you don’t have a certified DOT helmet. She listed all of the laws for the states. She stated the law should be the same in all states the states. She got persuasive as why there should be the same law in all of the states. Which was you have to wear a helmet in every state. She should have had a visual aid presentation instead of listing all the states off.
Motorcycle Safety Had a demonstration of all DOT helmets and what was not considered a DOT helmet. She told us that you would get a ticket if you don’t have a certified DOT helmet. She listed all of the laws for the states. She stated the law should be the same in all states the states. She got persuasive as why there should be the same law in all of the states. Which was you have to wear a helmet in every state. She should have had a visual aid presentation instead of listing all the states off. Sinclair Brown
I think that the speech about hard drive was an interesting speech. I got the feeling that this person knew the subject very well. He did a great job describing what hard drive is, how it works. He made it clear how important is the size of a hard drive. I like the fact that he used visual aid (which was the hard drive it self), the only problem with that was that I couldn’t see the small parts of it from my space in the end of a classroom. I think that the speech could be much better if the speaker used some valuable sources, not only his own knowledge. Also I would like to hear clear transition between the topics, that would make the speech easier for audience to follow along. The major problem in this speech was the timing, speaker didn’t get in to the conclusion, very important part of any speech. I believe that if he was able to finish his speech I wold have a better understanding on a subject. Over all I found this speech very informative. For a person like me who doesn’t know much about computer I could learn the basic, and at least now I have slight idea what a hard drive is and how it works.
Peer Critique: Joe Klapperich Purpose: To Inform Specific Purpose: To inform: rules, environment, tools, and clarify on sport misconception. Thesis: Inform about paintball as a sport. Organizational Pattern: Topical Introduction: Joe’s speeches are always very exciting and filled with visual aids the capture the audience’s attention. Joe began his informative speech stating ‘…many have heard, some are misinformed…’ He stressed safety several times, which he illustrated the “misconception” Body: The majority of his speech was a show and tell, which was interesting, but tended to go into too much detail. (E.g. barrels in 12”, 16”, and 22”) Just T. M. I. Some of the jargon Joe described well such as the chronograph, however the “dead zone” was poorly elaborated. * Para Language – rate was a little slow, but not bad. Conclusion: No Conclusion given, out of time. In Conclusion, I find Joe to be an effective informative speaker, but to give a convincing persuasive; he should be more cognitive of his paralanguage. I did see Joe speaking to his audience in an extemporaneous tone as well. Good job Joe!
Kristine’s speech was well put together and flowed very nicely after she got past the introduction. The introduction was confusing about why drugs were being flashed at us. Her visual aid didn’t seem add anything to her speech. She did however seem very comfortable when giving her speech. Her presence was good and she did a good job of informing. Her information about how name brand drugs cost more because they have to cover the cost of advertising was very good. She had some minor contradictions towards the end regarding why you would want to go with generic or name brand. I don’t think that the topic was something really brought the audience in. Overall, I think she did a good job differentiating between generic and name brand drugs.
Patricia Lee Ann Drone December 13, 2006 Communications-Night Class Mr. Grant-Teacher
Peer Critic -Daniel Day
I believe Daniel Day did a great job! His speech was very informative. He used every day life experiences, as stayed on topic. I also enjoyed the example of how Alice and Bob were dating and when you encrypt the email that your boss wants to read it would confused. He proved his thesis, which was “a message within a message.” There are also a few errors in his presentation. When he started he went straight into the history of the topic and then gave the definition of Cryptography. In his PowerPoint the little messages were small and the audience could not see it. Other than that he did a great job!
Alicia’s speech was about gastric bypass surgery. She explained how the surgery is for people who are morbidly obese. She had didn’t have good eye contact with the audience she only spoke to one side of the room. She explained why obese people choose to have the surgery. It helps to control other health problems that they suffer from. She explained that by saying a person with type II diabetes who has the surgery will see results soon after. I think she should have had a visual aid of the digestive system before surgery and after surgery. This would have given the audience a better understanding of how the procedure is done. Also, her wording could have been better, as far as using medical terminology. She only explained what one medical term was and the other terms were left for the audience to figure out. I thought that she did well using her personal story. That gave a better connection to the audience.
Overall a positive topic, very informative with what it is. She gave good points towards the signs and symptoms to this illness. The point that I brought up is that there should have been an explanation to what the appendix is and the function of it.
Critiqe ofNina's Speech on Anorexia Nervosa: Even though she knew the subject matter, she concentrated on the condition as if it was a weight lose technique in which women use to control their weight. What she failed to mention was that Anorexia is a psychological disorder which require profession psychological help. She should have narrowed the scope because the subject she was speaking about is a very broad one. However she showed she had done her homework on the subject even though she did not cite her sources. I also felt she had good voice control even though she looked as if she was bored. She gave her entire speech with her arms cross. Overall she did just as well as anyone else in the class who gave their speech.
This informative speech was done by Lee Ann. Although she had a topic which could be used as a very well informative, the speech it self was not very interesting, it was not well prepared and well organized. The power point also was not organized, to much content in the power point. During the speech I had the sense that Lee Ann did not practice the power point. Also the speech ended up talking about the Rodney King incident with the Los Angeles Police Department more than police corruption.
Alicia Clark Speech Critique 12/13/2006 Night Class
I Critiqued the speech of the young man that talked about Soccer, I'm not sure what his name is.
I think he used good description when explaining the terms of soccer Ex: like what a wing is he also has a lot of confidence when speaking in front of a crowd, has a lot of energy when speaking. I liked that he described the different types of cleats that you wear in dry weather and which ones are worn in the wet weather many people including myself did not know that. He lost me when he started talking about injuries I didn't see where that fit in the speech. He forgot to take about the rules of the game or at least didn't have time to get to it. All together I think he prepared well but kind of lost track of his subject since it is a broad one, he should've just picked one aspect like just the rules, or just the safety part. But all in all the speech was interesting.
I thought that Paul’s speech was very good. He seems very comfortable talking in front of people. I thought that the humor that he brought into his presentation was good, it make the speech more interesting. I thought it was good that he drew a picture on the broad as a visual aid. It helped show what an artery was and what it looked like. I also thought that it was good how he related himself to his topic to make it more interesting. Some things that I would improve are using more eye contact with the audience. Also don’t say “they,” you don’t state who “they,” are. Also he sounded unsure of the information that he presented.
Specific Purpose: To inform the audience of the tools and equipment used in firefighting.
Thesis: Firefighters use two types of equipment and many types of tools.
I think there was a very good description of the equipment and the tools and how they were used. Although, I do believe that some pictures would have made things a whole lot clearer. She had a good description with words that you could kind of just start to visualize, and then we would move on to the next tool. Point being, pictures would have held everything together better, I think.
It started off real good, and then she started reading the rest. So there was no visual contact. She speaks very softly; she already knows that, from all of our previous classes. But, she has gotten better over the past year.
She did say she was learning information about the equipment and tools to inform herself instead of to inform the audience. Oops!!
I would have liked to hear more about what firefighters do with their tools and equipment on calls. Maybe if a couple examples of a few of their calls and how they handle them could have been explained. I think that would have been a really interesting topic.
Also I didn’t hear any sources that were used for research or that we could refer back to for more information.
WHY DOES VA HAVE TO BE SO STRICT ABOUT HELMET LAWS?
1.-The person stop and tough about what she need it to say. I tough she was not ready for her speech. 2.-She was making a sound with her mouth that it was distracting her audience, and also she was moving her hair to much. 3.- The speech was suppose to be informative and she gave a persuasive speech. 4.-The transactions that she did were not really clear I got loss trying to understand what she was talking about. 5.- The information that she used was not update information. 6.- The source that she used were not show in her power point presentation. 7.- She gave a lot of her personal opinion.
He did an excellent job. He sited his sources while he was reading. He was aware of gestational diabetes, which most people don't think about when talking about diabetes. He seemed like he was well informed about the subject. However, he had a long pause in the beginning when he lost his place. He didn't have much eye contact with the audience. His voice was very monotone throughout the speech. He didn't draw the audience in, he should have told us a story about someone he knows who has had diabetes. but overall i think he did very good.
I had to critic the speech about spinal bifida. I thought her speech was well organized had plenty of info. Her transitions were good. The only negative thing I can say is she should have had better visual aids and she should have read less and learned how to pronounce the medical terminology better.
I think that josh had a very informative speech. He explained a lot of the things and a lot of the terms that people didnt know. Some of the terms I was lost with at first but at the end of the speech i caught on to what they were. I think he had good eye contact and a good voice tone. The only thing that i thought he did wrong was he had no conclusion. He was talking about his topic then just stopped. Other then that it was a good speech.
I think that while his speech was informative, he could have been better prepared. His visual aid display should have been brought out earlier and a power point presentation would have kept the audiences attention better and saved time. Jargon was well explained, but would have like to have heard more on how HAM radios save lives.
Joe's speech on the ongoing console war was very interesting and informative. His introduction was good and Joe stayed on topic very well throughout the entire speech. There are a few things Joe could have done better. When explaining each console he could have gone into more detail, as to why one console may be better than the other, by explaining more of the features of each console. He also could improve on engaging the audience more by using hand gestures and giving more eye contact instead of looking down at his paper during his speech. I was sitting fairly close to where he was giving his speech and found it hard to hear him at times, so one final thing I think he could do to improve is to speak a little louder.
19 comments:
Motorcycle Safety
Had a demonstration of all DOT helmets and what was not considered a DOT helmet. She told us that you would get a ticket if you don’t have a certified DOT helmet.
She listed all of the laws for the states.
She stated the law should be the same in all states the states. She got persuasive as why there should be the same law in all of the states. Which was you have to wear a helmet in every state.
She should have had a visual aid presentation instead of listing all the states off.
Motorcycle Safety
Had a demonstration of all DOT helmets and what was not considered a DOT helmet. She told us that you would get a ticket if you don’t have a certified DOT helmet.
She listed all of the laws for the states.
She stated the law should be the same in all states the states. She got persuasive as why there should be the same law in all of the states. Which was you have to wear a helmet in every state.
She should have had a visual aid presentation instead of listing all the states off.
Sinclair Brown
Agata Plazewska
COM 110
12/13/06
Peer Critique on speech “Hard Drive”
I think that the speech about hard drive was an interesting speech.
I got the feeling that this person knew the subject very well. He did a great job describing what hard drive is, how it works. He made it clear how important is the size of a hard drive. I like the fact that he used visual aid (which was the hard drive it self), the only problem with that was that I couldn’t see the small parts of it from my space in the end of a classroom.
I think that the speech could be much better if the speaker used some valuable sources, not only his own knowledge. Also I would like to hear clear transition between the topics, that would make the speech easier for audience to follow along. The major problem in this speech was the timing, speaker didn’t get in to the conclusion, very important part of any speech. I believe that if he was able to finish his speech I wold have a better understanding on a subject.
Over all I found this speech very informative. For a person like me who doesn’t know much about computer I could learn the basic, and at least now I have slight idea what a hard drive is and how it works.
Daniel Day
COM110
12-12-06
Peer Critique: Joe Klapperich
Purpose: To Inform
Specific Purpose: To inform: rules, environment, tools, and clarify on sport misconception.
Thesis: Inform about paintball as a sport.
Organizational Pattern: Topical
Introduction: Joe’s speeches are always very exciting and filled with visual aids the capture the audience’s attention.
Joe began his informative speech stating ‘…many have heard, some are misinformed…’ He stressed safety several times, which he illustrated the “misconception”
Body: The majority of his speech was a show and tell, which was interesting, but tended to go into too much detail. (E.g. barrels in 12”, 16”, and 22”) Just T. M. I.
Some of the jargon Joe described well such as the chronograph, however the “dead zone” was poorly elaborated. * Para Language – rate was a little slow, but not bad.
Conclusion: No Conclusion given, out of time.
In Conclusion, I find Joe to be an effective informative speaker, but to give a convincing persuasive; he should be more cognitive of his paralanguage. I did see Joe speaking to his audience in an extemporaneous tone as well. Good job Joe!
Name brand vs. generic drugs
Kristine’s speech was well put together and flowed very nicely after she got past the introduction. The introduction was confusing about why drugs were being flashed at us. Her visual aid didn’t seem add anything to her speech. She did however seem very comfortable when giving her speech. Her presence was good and she did a good job of informing. Her information about how name brand drugs cost more because they have to cover the cost of advertising was very good. She had some minor contradictions towards the end regarding why you would want to go with generic or name brand. I don’t think that the topic was something really brought the audience in. Overall, I think she did a good job differentiating between generic and name brand drugs.
Brad Crowder
Patricia Lee Ann Drone
December 13, 2006
Communications-Night Class
Mr. Grant-Teacher
Peer Critic
-Daniel Day
I believe Daniel Day did a great job! His speech was very informative. He used every day life experiences, as stayed on topic. I also enjoyed the example of how Alice and Bob were dating and when you encrypt the email that your boss wants to read it would confused. He proved his thesis, which was “a message within a message.”
There are also a few errors in his presentation. When he started he went straight into the history of the topic and then gave the definition of Cryptography. In his PowerPoint the little messages were small and the audience could not see it. Other than that he did a great job!
Carlotta Sommers
Com-110
December 12, 2006
Peer Critique for Alicia Clark, Gastric Bypass.
Alicia’s speech was about gastric bypass surgery. She explained how the surgery is for people who are morbidly obese. She had didn’t have good eye contact with the audience she only spoke to one side of the room. She explained why obese people choose to have the surgery. It helps to control other health problems that they suffer from. She explained that by saying a person with type II diabetes who has the surgery will see results soon after.
I think she should have had a visual aid of the digestive system before surgery and after surgery. This would have given the audience a better understanding of how the procedure is done. Also, her wording could have been better, as far as using medical terminology. She only explained what one medical term was and the other terms were left for the audience to figure out.
I thought that she did well using her personal story. That gave a better connection to the audience.
Critique
Jeremy Fletcher
121206
Topic: Appendicitis
Overall a positive topic, very informative with what it is. She gave good points towards the signs and symptoms to this illness. The point that I brought up is that there should have been an explanation to what the appendix is and the function of it.
From Duane Lamb/dualam1808
Critiqe ofNina's Speech on Anorexia Nervosa: Even though she knew the subject matter, she concentrated on the condition as if it was a weight lose technique in which women use to control their weight. What she failed to mention was that Anorexia is a psychological disorder which require profession psychological help. She should have narrowed the scope because the subject she was speaking about is a very broad one. However she showed she had done her homework on the subject even though she did not cite her sources. I also felt she had good voice control even though she looked as if she was bored. She gave her entire speech with her arms cross. Overall she did just as well as anyone else in the class who gave their speech.
Duane Lamb/dualam1808
Abdiaziz Ahmed
COM110
Peer Critique on “Police corruption”.
This informative speech was done by Lee Ann. Although she had a topic which could be used as a very well informative, the speech it self was not very interesting, it was not well prepared and well organized. The power point also was not organized, to much content in the power point. During the speech I had the sense that Lee Ann did not practice the power point. Also the speech ended up talking about the Rodney King incident with the Los Angeles Police Department more than police corruption.
Alicia Clark
Speech Critique
12/13/2006
Night Class
I Critiqued the speech of the young man that talked about Soccer, I'm not sure what his name is.
I think he used good description when explaining the terms of soccer Ex: like what a wing is he also has a lot of confidence when speaking in front of a crowd, has a lot of energy when speaking. I liked that he described the different types of cleats that you wear in dry weather and which ones are worn in the wet weather many people including myself did not know that. He lost me when he started talking about injuries I didn't see where that fit in the speech. He forgot to take about the rules of the game or at least didn't have time to get to it. All together I think he prepared well but kind of lost track of his subject since it is a broad one, he should've just picked one aspect like just the rules, or just the safety part. But all in all the speech was interesting.
Nina Page
Critique: Paul
Topic: Heart Attack
I thought that Paul’s speech was very good. He seems very comfortable talking in front of people. I thought that the humor that he brought into his presentation was good, it make the speech more interesting. I thought it was good that he drew a picture on the broad as a visual aid. It helped show what an artery was and what it looked like. I also thought that it was good how he related himself to his topic to make it more interesting. Some things that I would improve are using more eye contact with the audience. Also don’t say “they,” you don’t state who “they,” are. Also he sounded unsure of the information that he presented.
Jo Webb
12/19/06
COM110
J. Grant
Informative Speech Critique
Peer Critique: Crystal Wharton
Specific Purpose: To inform the audience of the tools and equipment used
in firefighting.
Thesis: Firefighters use two types of equipment and many types of tools.
I think there was a very good description of the equipment and the tools and how they were used. Although, I do believe that some pictures would have made things a whole lot clearer. She had a good description with words that you could kind of just start to visualize, and then we would move on to the next tool. Point being, pictures would have held everything together better, I think.
It started off real good, and then she started reading the rest. So there was no visual contact. She speaks very softly; she already knows that, from all of our previous classes. But, she has gotten better over the past year.
She did say she was learning information about the equipment and tools to inform herself instead of to inform the audience. Oops!!
I would have liked to hear more about what firefighters do with their tools and equipment on calls. Maybe if a couple examples of a few of their calls and how they handle them could have been explained. I think that would have been a really interesting topic.
Also I didn’t hear any sources that were used for research or that we could refer back to for more information.
HEIDY HEATH
COM-110
PEER CRITIQUE
WHY DOES VA HAVE TO BE SO STRICT ABOUT HELMET LAWS?
1.-The person stop and tough about what she need it to say. I tough she was not ready for her speech.
2.-She was making a sound with her mouth that it was distracting her audience, and also she was moving her hair to much.
3.- The speech was suppose to be informative and she gave a persuasive speech.
4.-The transactions that she did were not really clear I got loss trying to understand what she was talking about.
5.- The information that she used was not update information.
6.- The source that she used were not show in her power point presentation.
7.- She gave a lot of her personal opinion.
Crystal Wharton
Critique on Dwayne McGhee-Diabetes
He did an excellent job. He sited his sources while he was reading. He was aware of gestational diabetes, which most people don't think about when talking about diabetes. He seemed like he was well informed about the subject. However, he had a long pause in the beginning when he lost his place. He didn't have much eye contact with the audience. His voice was very monotone throughout the speech. He didn't draw the audience in, he should have told us a story about someone he knows who has had diabetes. but overall i think he did very good.
Informative Speech Critic
I had to critic the speech about spinal bifida. I thought her speech was well organized had plenty of info. Her transitions were good. The only negative thing I can say is she should have had better visual aids and she should have read less and learned how to pronounce the medical terminology better.
Richard Davis
Paul Johnson
Critique Josh
fios
I think that josh had a very informative speech. He explained a lot of the things and a lot of the terms that people didnt know. Some of the terms I was lost with at first but at the end of the speech i caught on to what they were. I think he had good eye contact and a good voice tone. The only thing that i thought he did wrong was he had no conclusion. He was talking about his topic then just stopped. Other then that it was a good speech.
HAM Radio
Peer Critiqe - Kevin Cornwell
I think that while his speech was informative, he could have been better prepared. His visual aid display should have been brought out earlier and a power point presentation would have kept the audiences attention better and saved time. Jargon was well explained, but would have like to have heard more on how HAM radios save lives.
Joe Funderberg
COMM 110
Dec 20, 2006
Game console wars
Peer Critiqe: Joe Funderberg
Joe's speech on the ongoing console war was very interesting and informative. His introduction was good and Joe stayed on topic very well throughout the entire speech. There are a few things Joe could have done better. When explaining each console he could have gone into more detail, as to why one console may be better than the other, by explaining more of the features of each console. He also could improve on engaging the audience more by using hand gestures and giving more eye contact instead of looking down at his paper during his speech. I was sitting fairly close to where he was giving his speech and found it hard to hear him at times, so one final thing I think he could do to improve is to speak a little louder.
Kevin Cornwell
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